This meditation attempts at looking at the groundlessness we are feeling in this time of great shifts, of feeling like everything is collapsing, burning…
The 5 Kleshas (obstacles t practice, or causes of suffering) are Avidya/ignorance, Asmita/self-identificatiion (ego), Raga/attachments (liking), Dvesha/aversion (dislike), and Abhiniveshah/Clinging to life. The Kleshas flow from Ignorance – Avidya (Wu Ming – 無明 no brightness, no wisdom). This is the traditional view. But there is a natural dislike of “ignorance” that occurs in us. We tend to not think of themselves as “ignorant” – as lacking wisdom or brightness
When we look at these 5 Kleshas, these causes of suffering, we can see that they are actually different aspects of the same problem. It does not matter which way we attempt to dissolve them. They are all about prioritizing “small self” over the great reality and “protecting the self” forgetting the whole.
Because we have just been experiencing a greater intimacy with Abhinivesha – fear of death, or clinging to life, perhaps this is a good door for this current time to look at upheaval. Sutra II.9 says that Abhinivesah, flows out of itself (life) and exists even in the wise ones. Life by definition propagates itself. All living beings are fearful for their lives (even ones with great wisdom!). All beings want to live: that flows out of being alive. But we cannot always recognize the expression of the love of life in others, due to our own love of life. In this meditation, we see if we can use Abhininvesha, itself a Klesha, as a tool to dissolve our Kleshas, by seeing that all beings – be they black, white, police, protester, looter or president – act out of clinging to life.
The first 3 exercises cultivate our capacity to bring mindfulness with no attachment to the object of mindfulness, preparing us to look at into our mental formations in the same manner.
In the first exercise, I rest my awareness on my breath, with one hand on the chest or abdomen. When I become aware that my awareness is no longer on my breath and that the foreground has been taken over by some other thought, I switch hands and reestablish my awareness of the breath.
In the second exercise, I turn my awareness to sounds. There ae always some sounds. Lightly resting the awareness on sounds, means I am not analyzing the sounds, not even naming them, just aware of sound. There will still be thoughts and sensations in the background of the mind, but I rest the awareness, the foreground, on sound. When I am aware that the foreground of the mind has been taken over by other thoughts and I am no longer aware of sounds, I touch my ear and restart paying attention to sounds.
In the third exercise I observe the flow of thoughts. Just aware of the movement of thoughts within me. As much as I can, I do not get involved with any thought, but keep the awareness of the thoughts in the foreground. I do not engage with the thoughts, I observe them. I touch my forehead and restart the process each time I become aware that I have been taken over by a thought.
In the fourth stage, I set my compass, my intention to Full Awakening. I simply set myself in the direction, I do not push anything. Like with the other exercises, I recognize each time I become aware that I am not “facing awakening” and redirect myself towards Buddha Nature.
In the fifth exercise, I look at my own Mara Nature: protecting my interests, wanting, rejecting, hating, demanding, expecting, not seeing value in, dominating, discriminating. I just become aware that I have “negative qualities” in me.
I now look at the world burning. I connect with people in Rome in the times of Caligula, I connect with people in Germany in the 30’s, etc. I connect with cultures and societies destroyed by destruction, wars, invasions, natural disasters.
The seventh exercise is looking at clinging to life. I see that the expressions of my Mara Nature are attempts to protect my life, to keep alive. I see that all beings, want to live. I see that there can be many expressions of the desire to live, and these can create conflicts, clashes, amongst beings. But still, each being acts out their desire to live.
I set my compass again towards Buddha Nature. I let go of the idea that my life is limited and needs to be protected. My life becomes infinite expressed as compassion, generosity, and love.