We are living in “changing times.” Our political systems have been showing the need for renewal, our communication systems are extremely different than they had been, we are bombarded with news, options, and information constantly, and, of course, we are looking at the potential of enormous shifts from the Corona virus and markets plunging. These shifts may prove to be just a little bump that we will forget about in 6 months, or they might change how we perceive ourselves individually, or even as a planet. We do not know what the future holds, but we can be clear about how our psyche is affected by the perception of “groundlessness” or being on ground we do not like.
As I have been contemplating the appropriate medicine, good practices, for “turbulent times,” and coming up with different tools to work with my mind, I realized that they all seem to come back to the basic practice of the Five Remembrances, which the Buddha (Upaijhatthana Sutta) recommended we recite each day.
That is why last night we meditated on the Five Remembrances. To recite these is one thing, and is a helpful reminder, but at times when I feel I do not know where my ground is, it is important to expand on each section and play with it, ply it out.
The Five Remembrances are:
I am of the nature to grow old.
There is no way to escape growing old.
I am of the nature to have ill-health.
There is no way to escape having ill health.
I am of the nature to die.
There is no way to escape death.
All that is dear to me and everyone I love are of the nature to change.
There is no way to escape being separated from them.
I inherit the results of my actions of body, speech, and mind.
My actions are my continuation.
(Another wording of the last one, which feels more “poetic” to some is
My actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions.
My actions are the ground upon which I stand.)
As I look at old age, I am looking at impermanence in my own being, accepting the changes that occur with age, both the so-called good ones and the less desirable ones (say, having wrinkled skin). Old age is a relative term. Yes, this is about embracing my own self as potentially very old, with grey hair, no teeth, perhaps in a nursing home, etc., but it is also to embrace myself as a 7 year old who is different that myself as a 5 year old. It is to embrace the constant movement and all the changes in my life.
As I look at health and acknowledging that ill-health is inevitable, it does not mean I deny that good health is possible, but only to not push away ill-health as something I do not want to ever encounter or which has nothing to do with me. This is to practice equanimity and to see that I can have great joy even when I have ill-health. I look at the failing parts of my body, at my fears of things like cancer (or Corona), and I recognize that all beings, throughout all of history have had diseases. My ill-health is not a “personal assault” on me (though it can feel that way…), it is just nature…
I look at my own death, and while I know I will die, I also recognize I have resistance to death, even though I know it cannot be avoided. So I look at all beings throughout all of time, and I see that again, it is not “my death” but death as nature, as the stream of life.
of course, we each have different “issues” around each of these subjects and we have to work out our own kinks in ways that will help us loosen them.
I then look at the fact that all my possessions and all those I love will be separated from me. Sometimes due to death, sometimes because circumstances or people have changed. We rely so heavily on “knowing” that our houses, cars, savings, social contacts, loved ones, will be there tomorrow. But, when we look at life, we see that this has rarely been true for most people in history. Wars, famines, natural disasters, have taught people time and time again that what I “have” now can be gone in a second. This can easily happen to me too, even though I live in a country that feels much more secure and has great expectations for stability.
So as I look at these “illusions” that I cultivate, and start to melt them, accepting my changing self, my fragile health, my death, and not really having anything that can for sure be there tomorrow, I start to ask, so what is there in this “me” – is there something that I can feel “oh yes, that will be here, I can count on this”?
In the fifth remembrance, I start to flash out “Karma.” What stays is some resonance, some vibration, of my actions, my thoughts. Of course, my thoughts and actions are constantly shifting also, but each leaves an impression in the universe, that can potentially affect huge changes at times far from now. Then I ask myself, what are the threads, what are the vibrations I want to be part of, that I want to define me. This is how I understand that threads like peace and love, can transcend impermanence and change, and it allows me to turn my mind from the fear of unpleasant change to peace and love, not in spite, but because, of the fears I have in myself around the nature of the world.
I hope this is helpful in these times of great change and turbulence. Many years ago a friend put it in this perspective – when you look at life, at the end of the day you realize that there is really nothing worth doing but to practice. Of course, very few of us follow this 100% of the time. But whatever one’s practice is, it is great to use turbulence as a reminder to some back to practice…