Meditation can be many different things. In a more “ultimate sense,” we might say that meditation is to “just be,” that is to be totally open, totally spacious, and therefore taking on a subject for meditation obviously narrows our scope and because it asks us to concentrate on the subject we are looking at, it is no longer being totally open or just being..
There are also those who use meditation as a relaxation technique, which, of course, is a valid form of meditation (not that anyone needs my stamp of validation…), and, at the very least, it is the prerequisite for any kind of meditation. In Buddhism, meditation is defined as having two components (note, these are not “phases” – it is not about “graduating phase 1 and moving to phase 2): Shamata and Vipashyana. Shamata is to stop the habitual mind therefore to calm it. Vipashyana is to look deeply, so as to see the interdependent nature of all (referred to as the true nature of all).
In Buddhist context meditation has to penetrate our suffering, otherwise it basically fails to address the First Noble Truth, the truth that life has suffering. The success of meditation can be “evaluated” by how well it transforms our suffering.
This is why I come up with these guided meditations. I recognize suffering within myself and then I go to the cushion and see how I can open to it, look at the suffering differently, and how I can transform this suffering and use it to create greater space within myself.
As the year started with news of fires in Australia, floods in Indonesia, and the prospect of war, I recognized the suffering within me, let alone the suffering of billions (literally – it is said that one billion animals were killed in Australia by the fires!). So I am looking at ways to look into that suffering, my congested mind, in a way that will create a spacious mind.
This was the purpose of the meditation last Tuesday.
- The first exercise is, of course, to just come back to awareness of the breath, calming the body and the mind.
Breathing in I know I am breathing in. Breathing out I know I am breathing out.
Breathing in, I enjoy my in-breath, breathing out I enjoy my out-breath.
This already builds up a reservoir of space within me. - In the second phase, I mobilize more resources to create space, to magnify and solidify it.
I touch elements that nurture positive seeds in my consciousness. I touch with my mind the full moon, the vast sky, rivers, mountains, meadows, flowers, etc. - With this “bank of spaciousness,” I now touch the suffering of fires, of floods, of wars, of fear, of anger, of grief, etc. I can see myself as an animal trapped in the fire, or smoke, not knowing how to escape, or a child in a bombed war zone, etc., etc.
I touch these images with my mind, not pulling away, but opening to the suffering as best I can. I can stop doing this at any point and come back to my breathing to create more space, and then see if can touch suffering again.
I am not trying to not be affected by suffering. Quite the opposite. But I am using the protection of a more spacious mind so that the effect of touching suffering is not congestion, or refusal to look, but a further opening which we call compassion.
I am of the opinion that tears during meditation are a good thing. These are tears that come from opening the heart-mind. They are not the tears of pity (self or other), but the tears of compassion, of recognition of suffering that plies the heart open. This is tenderness (or softness), as Pema Chodron likes to describe it. There is a clear physical difference between congestive tears and tears that flow from an opening. - I touch stars and galaxies. This both gives me a sense of vastness and also a contrast to how we see suffering.
- I see that even stars and galaxies collapse and disappear. This starts to erode the contrast we normally have – we do not think of stars as suffering, we do not think of stars as disappearing or collapsing, or dying, and yet they do. I might even ask “does a star feel fear when it collapses?” Of course, I cannot answer that question with any clarity, but the question itself gives me some possibilities of releasing fear. A star collapses and its atoms, its energy, still continues in the vast stream of the life of the universe. The form has definitely changed, the universe, however, keeps on. The star has merely folded into the universe.
- I see that everything collapses into the vast stream of life, of the universe, and continues. Just as stars do, so do sentient beings, trees, etc. Everything changes and stops to exist at some point as it once was and becomes part of the universe.
- I am in touch with the suffering of the individual being threatened with extinction, and I am also in touch the immenseness of life. Holding both perspectives simultaneously.
- With both perspectives, just open, I just sit.
I hope this meditation is helpful in these difficult times, to give us a somewhat more spacious view. It is not meant to make suffering “irrelevant,” but quite the opposite, it is meant to make it the fuel for our ability to open and soften, for our compassion. This is a state that allows for action to be taken to help, while still accepting that my actions may not end the suffering, but are still needed, if not for others, than at the very lest for myself. This can then be action that accepts and is not attached to the results.
Last night, at the York library, a woman said she had been feeling very sad, depressed and hopeless because she kept contemplating the plight of the Koala bears in Australia, and that this meditation has helped her break through her despair.
Of course, I also thought of Koala bears (and kangaroos too): Toro likes to suck on my arm and climbs on t in a manner that reminds me of a Koala bear. I often call him Koala Bear! And, there were many snakes and reptiles, who I do not find cuddly or cute, and who I am actually quite fearful of. So this is further contemplation: all beings, cute, pleasing, ugly, or threatening, desire to live and experience fear when their life is threatened. I try to open my heart to all and transcend my discrimination.